Essay number twenty-five: by The Midnight Writer
Denial
Denial comes in two forms. Lying to others and lying to ourselves. This essay is about self-denial. We are all aware of the level of lying that exists today but we rarely look at how much we lie to ourselves.
We deceive ourselves more than we want to admit. More often than not it is to preserve the self-image we have projected to the world. Rarely do you find a person with the courage to project their true self to their peers. We want to belong and we try to avoid those things we think others would find unusual. You may go out on the town with your friends when you would much rather stay at home and read a book because you fear what their reaction would be if you stayed at home. The desire to fit in, in both your thoughts and actions, does more than just change who we project ourselves to be. It also changes who we perceive ourselves to be. We do this every day in an effort to become who we think we should be rather than who we actually are.
The majority of people have been denying their true self for so long that they no longer know who they are or who God intended for them to be. Do you believe that anyone in your life knows who you really are? Do you feel lost and have no idea who you really are? If you feel that way you are not alone. You are in the majority.
It is time for you to find your true self and let go of all of the self-denial that has defined your life. Write down all of the things that you believe in and the principles that you want to live by. Write down all of the things which you project to the world that you believe do not represent who you really are.
The fear of being alone and the desire to associate with your peers have caused you to lose sight of who you really wanted to be. How many of you started smoking cigarettes as a teenager because you saw it as a rite of passage into adulthood? How many of you began dating or engaging in sexual behavior long before being ready because you were afraid of being viewed as juvenile.
You justified all of the foolish decisions you made in your life by hiding from and denying the inner self that knew better. Regardless of your age, don’t you think today would be a good day to start finding your true self? Once you know who you truly are and where you want to go with your life you need to have the courage to say to the world; Here I am world. Accept or reject me for my true self.
Do not be afraid of being alone. You are never alone. You are inseparably connected to the entire world. There will be others that will love you for who you are rather than who you think they may want you to be.